... and lots more! :-)
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Our friend and neighbour Monique works for Menzies Aviation Netherlands at Schiphol Airport. Today was a special day for family and friends. We got a guided tour around the company premises. It was very interesting and nice to see these things so close: air cargo, import/export, transport, very big sheds/hangars, etc. The last part and for me highlight of the tour was a demonstration by Diag-Nose with search dogs. Really amazing what they do! The dogs are very enthusiastic, weel-trained and loved by their human collegues. They really see the dogs as co-workers and obviously care about them very much. We also got a demonstration of a new technique called RASCargO, where the dogs don't even have to go into the cargo sheds. Again, amazing! The guided tour lasted more than two hours of walking-standing still-walking, etc. Very tiring, but very worthwhile!
Friday, January 25, 2008
Today Ron got the long-awaited letter from the CBR and........ he is declared unlimited fit to drive a truck!!! He can go to the cityhall and renew his driver's license for all categories he had before. Woohoo!!! *happy dance* :-D
The odds this would happen were very little (because of his burn-out and depression, and European legislation), but we kept the faith and won! If I ever doubted whether magic works, that's over now.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Can you guess which books I've read or own?
Monday, January 21, 2008
This weekend (friday-saturday-sunday) I attended a workshop by Phyllis Curott for the Ara Lowlands group in Otterlo. The theme was "Dancing with your shadow". In this case shadow stands for the not-so-positive parts of your personality: vices, "negative" emotions, things you hide or deny. Phyllis taught us exercises and gave us tools to retrace, face and embrace them. It was heavy stuff and hard work, but very rewarding! I really had a breakthrough in dealing with the ugly-me-monster. Where years of therapy didn't succeed in changing my distorted body image, a simple (though not easy...) exercise turned out to be the boost into the right direction. A major step. There's still a lot of work to be done in that area, but for the first time I believe I can beat this.
Alongside the hard work we had a great time too! It was good to see Phyllis again, to talk to her and work with her. During the first two workshops the groups were large, now we were with only nine (including Phyllis and our "goddess-mother"). Saturday night we did a wonderful ritual. It was the first time we wore our green robes. We also made several shamanic journeys.
We'll hear a.s.a.p. when the initiation will be. We hope in september / october, but it depends on the deadline of Phyllis' new book.
I was home at half past seven last night. I'm exhausted, but that was to be expected. The fabulous weekend was more than worth it!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Last Thursday Ron got another setback. We went to the cityhall to renew his driver's license. Ron also has a license for lorry/truck and trailer; in Dutch we say "groot rijbewijs" (big driver's license). The civil servant asked him if he had been examined. It is not commonly known, but for 2 years now it is obligatory to be examined for people renewing their "big license". It was a major blow, but at least we could make an appointment for an examination last Friday.
Ron was very nervous for the test, there was so much depending on it for him. Unfortunately his fear was grounded. Because of Ron's depression there's a very real possibility he can't renew his truck license! The burn-out and anti-depressants are no problem... Ron was devastated to hear that. His license has practical but also emotional value for him, because his father was a truckdriver. So stupid it will be difficult to renew! If he had renewed it before November (before the depression was diagnosed) everything would be fine for 10 years. It's just nor fair! Ron is a very good driver, car or truck. And it's not only me saying that!
Hopefully there is a way to try to prevent all this. Ron's psychiatrist will write a note saying his depression is due to his mother's death and he's doing better already. The anti-depressants have been subscribed because of the burn-out. The examination doctor said that with such a note he would make a chance. So... fingers crossed! If you can send energy, light a candle, etc... Please do so!
Last saturday I wrote and performed a ritual with Wonder at his place for Ron. It was very powerful. In a meditation we struggled with the demons in his head and defeated them. I wrote them down and burned it in the cauldron. Then we meditated on Ron getting better, healthier, working in a job he likes, etc. I carved a green candle and rubbed it with a special oil. I felt a lot better, the trust that everything will be okay is back. Ron has felt something (peace and quiet) too, directly after the ritual.
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Want to read more? Go here!
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
The new year helped me to make a new start in eating. I finally succeeded in breaching the vicious circle, the binging... It is hard, very hard. I'm glad I did it though, it was about time to get a grip on myself!
I stepped on the scales last week, I'm back to 100++ kg... I expected that, I knew before I saw the figures. I can't blame anyone but myself. I don't want to linger on blaming myself. I know it so well and it doesn't work.
This new start is different new start than others in the past. I'm not setting any unreachable goals, I don't stop eating, I'm not putting myself on a killer diet. This time I'm doing it the right way. Start eating normally, change habits, stop fooling myself. So far it's going okay. Not perfect, but okay. That's good enough.
Last Thursday I went with Ron to his psychiatrist. She's good. I talked freely and told her about my feelings. She knows enough about eating disorders not to make the classic therapist mistakes, what a relief! She was honest enough to say that she doesn't know whether she can help me. That's fine. If she's willing to give it a try, so am I. This thursday is the next appointment.
is a group of cat lovers
Freyja & Bastet like Foofur and Boris a lot. Especially Bastet, who loves to wash them and sleep closely against them. Maia is curious after the dogs, but still keeps her distance.
Here are some of the many pics of our dogs and cats together:
Thursday, January 03, 2008
I can do this!!! *LOL*
Tuesday, January 01, 2008
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.
(Alfred Lord Tennyson)