Merlin Sythove 1955-2012

On January 3rd of this new year Merlin Sythove passed to the Summerlands after he lost the battle with cancer. Although he wasn't a close friend, I'm glad our paths have crossed more than once. I'll miss him. He was a wise man who shared his knowledge happily and freely. We didn't always agree, but always agreed to disagree with mutual respect.

He was an important man for wicca in The Netherlands. In his last days his family, friends, acquaintances and others gathered together on his Facebook-page and on his Silver Circle forum, united in our sorrow. Numerous candles were lit around the world, healing sent, thoughts shared, etc. Even then (and still...) he brought people together.

Last Saturday we celebrated his life in an impressive and moving ceremony. Lots of people came together, dressed in medieval or appropriate fantasy style as was his wish. My heartfelt condolences go out to the people close to him. He'll be missed by many. Thank you for everything, Merlin. May you rest in peace. Until we meet again!

• Merlin Sythove, witch extraordinaire - In Memoriam (Wiccan Rede Online)
• Merlin's Archive - a collection of articles, mostly written by Merlin Sythove. Often published in Wiccan Rede, sometimes written by others and / or published in other journals or web sites.
• Merlin about himself (in Dutch, but you can click the translate button for English, German or French)
• Silver Circle - Center for The Old Religion, founded in 1979

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Elegy For a Dead Witch

by Doreen Valiente

To think that you are gone, over the crest of the hills, 

As the Moon passed from her fullness, riding the sky, 

 And the White Mare took you with her. 

 To think that we will wait another life 

 To drink the wine from the horns and leap the fire. 

 Farewell from this world, but not from the Circle. 

 That place that is between the worlds 

 Shall hold return in due time. Nothing is lost. 

 The half of a fruit from the tree of Avalon 

 Shall be our reminder, among the fallen leaves 

 This life treads underfoot. Let the rain weep. 

 Waken in sunlight from the Realms of Sleep.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Happy New Year

Happy New Year, everyone! Sorry I'm a bit late though... A lot is happening, more about that later. 

I won't do a 2011 review, I don't feel like it. A lot of bad stuff has happened then and I don't want to think about that anymore. I want to move forwards. I also have a lot to be thankful for, and I want that to be the focus for the new year!

Yuletide blessings

May this Yule 
by the turning of the wheel 
bring love, peace, health,

happiness & good fortune;

hoping the rebirth of the light

shines new rays of hope

on you and yours!

Happy Holidays to all of you, my friends!

Blogblast For Peace 2011

Today I'm joining hundreds of bloggers across the world in a movement called "Blogblast For Peace". Bloggers will unite in a global cry for peace in this annual event. One day. One voice. All it takes is one post. Won't you join us?

This is the fourth time I'm participating in Blogblast for Peace (and an extra one on 9/11 this year). I stumbled upon this simple but true quote by Mother Teresa and decided to build this year's globe around it. I chose children's drawings of smiles; also simple but very effective!

Blogblast for Peace links

• BFP website
• info on Mimi's blog
• eventpage on Facebook
• fanpage on Facebook
• grouppage on Facebook

Blessed Samhain!

Some time ago I received an intriguing invitation: making a death mask for Samhain with a small group! I didn't have to think long and decided I'd definitely want to be there. So last Saturday it was time! Unfortunately one of the women wasn't feeling well, so we ended up being with 6 'wyld & wicked women'! ;-) Some had met each other before. I only knew the hostess beforehand, so I had the privilege to get to know 4 wonderful women.

First we had dinner at a beautiful Samhain-decorated table. Everyone had an extra plate for someone behind the veils. We shared stories about those people and animals while eating in their honour. This year I dedicated my plate to my dad. For dinner we had a very yummy salad, delicious pasta with pesto and salmon, an exquisite quiche and very tasty pizza! The dessert was even better: heavenly cheesecake and divine pecan pie with vanilla ice-cream.

In the temple called "Ons Ding" ("Our Thing") we prepared the plaster bandages for the masks. In the background you see the veils to the other world and on the right the beautiful altar.
We made the masks in pairs. To protect our skin and to make the mask easier to release we covered our face with a lot of cream. I had a nasty cold, so I was a bit nervous whether I could persevere the plaster. I decided to put some straws in my mouth, so I had both nose and mouth to breathe. Still, it wasn't easy! I started thinking a lot of "what-ifs". That wasn't going to help me persist so I went into a meditative state and that was the right decision. I did it!
Then it was my turn to make a mask. I soon felt I was very tired and the cold didn't make it any easier. I wanted to finish the mask, so I kept on putting plaster bandages. I struggled. I realized it wasn't working and felt so bad... Finally I asked someone else to take over. That was so hard, I felt I had failed miserably. In the kitchen I cried, but everyone was so kind and comforting! My mask partner got a beautiful mask nevertheless and she wasn't disappointed (as I had feared). On the contrary, she accepted her own lesson in this with grace; we talked it over and hugged.

Afterwards we all talked about what making the masks had done with us. Generally speaking death-masks are made after a person dies. Look here for examples. To do it on a living person can feel strange, especially when the eyes and mouth are covered. You literally shut them up...
Meanwhile, it was very late so we set up the beds and dived in! Unfortunately one of the women had to go home. I slept next to the veils in Ons Ding. In the morning we had a long breakfast / brunch, closed the circle and then we said our goodbyes. Thank you for everything, lovely ladies!

Witch's tools

I've got a lot of 'witchy stuff': statues, incense-burners, candle-holders, stones, feathers, altar cloths, etc. etc. Some bought (new or second-hand), some given to me, some self-made. Over the years it made a nice collection. I made my own runes and my pentacle. Some things I have more of. For example I have my 'official' athame, but I also have a wooden one that Ron carved for me in Lier. Both very precious to me!

As a boline I mostly used a pretty little knife from Scandinavia. I have been looking for an 'official' one for years. For me it had to be a sickle with a white handle. The ones in pagan shops didn't appeal to me though; they are all the same. I trusted that eventually it would come to me. And it did!

This year on Castlefest I came across a blacksmith called Roodbaert (red-beard, and indeed he had one!). Ron and I talked with him and I told him how I saw the boline I wanted. He understood exactly what I wanted and its purpose. He told us he had recently got his hands on over 400 years old iron nails. He offered to try to make my knife from those, and at a very reasonable price.

A few weeks ago the knife arrived. We had asked him to make it with a simple handle, because I wanted to wrap it with white leather myself. It took some time but I'm very very satisfied with the result!
(click on the pics to see them bigger)

Lowlands Asatru Thing

In the second weekend of October Ron and I went to the first Lowlands Asatru Thing. A 'thing' in its historical meaning is a court assembly, but was later used for an assembly of the people. Asatru is explained here. Lowlands is self-explanatory I guess. The purpose of the meeting was to bring together asatruar (practitioner of asatru) and people interested in asatru for various purposes. We gathered in "De Grote Bunte" in Nunspeet, a beautiful place surrounded by nature.

We arrived in the early evening of Friday, after an aggravating drive because the car stopped running on LPG. We decided to leave that there and then and have a great weekend, which we did! :-)
Later in the evening the LAT was officially opened. Around the tables we all gave a little introduction of ourselves. I'm not astruar, my path is witchcraft / wicca, but I like to work with the Norse pantheon and was curious to learn more about it. There were several people I already knew and I got to know new people.

On Saturday there were some very interesting workshops: how to look at historic sources, spirits of the land, introduction to the 'high seat of the seer' and deity of Dutch soil. All very interesting and thought-provoking! In the entrance-hall and the workshop-room were a lot of books on display. Great to roam about!

In the evening there was a blot (asatru ritual). The weather wasn't that great, a lot of rain all weekend. The blot was outside, it was dry at first. Of course it started to rain, long live the lowlands! :-) We decided to stay outside nevertheless and had a wonderful ritual in the pouring rain. Quite different from what I am used to, great to witness and be part of!

Sunday I was up and about very early and decided to take a walk in the woods behind the buildings. It was very beautiful and I made a lot of pictures. Of one place I made 3 pics within 5 seconds and was surprised to see them. I leave it up to you what to make of it...

After breakfast we attended two workshops: making a bind-rune and burn it into a wooden slice and singing power-chants. Afterwards we did a closing ritual and all went our different ways. Until next year! :-)

Adiana again

Last week I had an appointment for the final test of the Adiana procedure, the hysterosalpingogram. HSG is a fertility testing technique that involves the injection of a special dye into the uterus through the cervical opening. The progression of the dye is then monitored via x-ray. It shows whether the tubes are completely closed or not.

It was done by another gynaecologist. She was very friendly and did her best, but man oh man... it was SO painful! I know I have a low pain barrier, but still... Everything she did hurt, and hurt badly! Ron later said she was very young and seemed a bit insecure and clumsy when she didn't get it right in one try. I can handle pain impulses, but it just didn't stop hurting. I couldn't relax locally as I did with the Adiana procedure itself.  I could watch the screens and follow the dye. I cannot describe how I felt when I clearly saw one tube wasn't closed completely.... Oh NO! What a disappointment...

Afterwards I felt shaky and when the gynaecologist and nurse left I burst into tears. I was in pain and lost quite a lot of blood. The doctor had said that was normal, so I wasn't alarmed and in the days after it slowly got less and eventually disappeared.

Today I spoke with my own gynaecologist. He told me only a very small percentage of tubes wasn't closed completely after 6 months. Of course I belong to that minority, just my luck... :-( We agreed to do another internal ultrasound scan next week, just to be sure the inserts are still in place. Then in 3 months we have to repeat the HSG. Unfortunately there is no other way to indisputably prove the closing of the tubes. He promised me he'll do it himself and in a slightly different way. Not completely painless, but hopefully a bit more bearable. With something to relax and pain medication beforehand I think I'll manage, but I'm not looking forward to it!

UPDATE Oct. 17: Just got back from the ultrasound. The inserts are still in place. One is slightly further into my tube, what might be why it isn't completely closed yet. The new HSG will be done in January.

Worlds Biggest Summit (free!)

Worlds Biggest Summit

Goddess Leonie of Goddess Guidebook.com is organizing a wonderful event, and it's completely free! Learn from 100+ great teachers including SARK, Julia Cameron, Lynn V. Andrews and many many more. Business luminaries, spirituality leaders, health & wellness visionaries, creativity goddesses, the writers you worship, the bloggers you bow to, the geniuses you ogle, the wisdom you’re craving...

It's online, so you can download and listen when the time is right for you!
Come and join us!

The Queen's Meme Cat edition

We shall talk cats this week. Puuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr....

1. Do you have a cat?
Yes, three!

2. What is your cat's name?
They are named after goddesses: Freyja, Bastet & Maia

3. What makes you love cats?
How can one NOT love cats? They are beautiful, independent, obstinate, loving, purring and soooo much more! Couldn't live without them!

4. If you are not a cat person, why not?
I am a cat person and a dog person. They say that's rare, most people are the one or the other, or at least have a preference.

5. What is the funniest thing your cat has ever done?
It never bores me to look at a cat playing with something simple like a paper pellet or a dripping tap. Makes me smile every time!

6. Do you think cats have feelings and can talk to their owners?
I like to think they have feelings. My cats talk (meow) to me, just wished I knew the language!

7. The Rainbow Bridge is the place where cats go when they pass away. I think it's a lovely idea. If humans could have a bridge of their own in the afterlife, what would you name it?
I say we all go to the same Rainbow Bridge. When we arrive at the bridge our pets are waiting for us to cross it with us to the Summerland.

BONUS POINTS! Post a picture of you and your cat.

I can't find a pic of me with all three of them, but here they are. 

From left to right Maia, Freyja, Bastet!

(the links bring you to their Catster-pages)

I remember 9/11

No words can ever really express my feelings, 

so I respectfully stay silent in remembering...


(This post is published on 2011-09-11 14:46 Dutch time,
the exact moment of the first plain hitting the WTC 10 years ago)

Freddie 65

Freddie Mercury would have been 65 today. He is still missed by so many, but he will live forever through the music legacy he left behind for us...

Google honoured Freddie in a special Doodle today:

Sick and tired

Yep, I was sick... again! I've missed all the flu attacks since I started taking echinacea a few years ago. Everyone around me got it, except me. But this year it seems to be my turn, despite the echinacea I'm still taking. And it keeps coming back. This last week I was sick for the fourth time in just three months! Of course I was a good girl, listened to my body and stayed in bed or on the couch. I'm feeling a bit better now and I sincerely hope this was it. I'm sick and tired of always being sick and tired! Most of the time I can handle the 'tired'-part, but I'm fed up with being sick and/or feeling under the weather. All the stress in our life can't be good, but I can't take that away. If only I could... *sigh*
Okay, enough ranting. Just thought I'd let you know where I've been this week.

Farewell to Miss Peach

(image found at Purrchance To Dream / 
made by Jan of Jan's Funny Farm for the Cat Blogosphere)

This morning I found out that Miss Peach has gone to the Rainbow Bridge. That made me so very sad... Who is Miss Peach, you think? Well, in her own words: "I am Misses Peach, an 18 year old Victorian Devon Rex kitty who tolerates living in this modern world but would rather live in Jane Austen or Beatrix Potters time." A cat? Yes, but not just any cat...

As a beginning blogger I visited Miss Peach's Meowz, my first encounter with a blogging cat. Little did I know... There is a whole Cat Blogosphere of cats with blogs! Cat-lover as I am, I started following a lot of them. Miss Peach always had her special place in my heart. Can you care for a cat you've never met irl? I know I can! Non-catlovers and non-bloggers (and maybe more people) might not understand, but I don't care. Of course it's not the same as loving my own furballs, but that doesn't mean it isn't real...

Rest in peace, sweet tiny Miss Peach! You'll be missed around the world... My heart goes out to her loving family, that took such great care of her until the very end. A candle will be burning in front of my Bast statue for all of you!

The Queen's Meme - The Upside Down Question Meme

Questions you say? Today we shall ask questions about..well....questions. I shall pose a question. Your answer must be a question. Behold your brain-twisting activity for the day...

 

If you could ask one question of the following .....
What would your question be?

Your iPod
"How do you know exactly what song to play 'at random'?"

Casey Anthony
"How did it come this far???"

Your ex's last ex
I think I am my ex's last ex...

Your pet
"Can you really understand a word I'm saying?"

John Lennon
"Can you forgive Mark Chapman?"

Your great-grandmother on your father's side
"How did a typical day in your life unfold?"

Your mirror
"Why can't you just lie to me?"