Who do you love?

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 15
"We'd love to see your loved ones! Your cats, your kids, your loves, your sisters, your brothers, your friends, your visitors, your elders, your neighbours, your besties. Who do you love?"

~*~*~*~

First and foremost I ask you to click on this picture to open a new window with a post I made yesterday to celebrate the love of my life, my husband Ron. Cliche as it may be, it's the truth!

Although they are no longer with us in this world, I will always love my mum and dad. Dad died in 1996 and mum in 2006, but I still miss them every day... Here they are opening christmas-presents at our home somewhere in the 90's:

I love my sister Joke. She is 10 years older, but at our current ages of 45 and 55 that's no issue anymore. We've had our ups and downs like all sisters have, but we both know we can unconditionally count on each other whenever needed. Her husband Leo came into my life when I was 8. I love him too, but sadly we lost him on my birthday in 2009. Here are Joke and I in Disneyland Paris in 2010:

And of course our pets belong here too. Although I won't share pics of all that went before, they all are still in my heart too. I'll see them at the rainbow bridge... Here are the beloved ones that share our home today:

Foofur, Welsh Corgi / Jack Russell, 14

Arwen, Bernese Mountain Dog, 4

Freyja, silver/white Balinese, 7

Bastet, tortoise European Shorthair, 7

Maia, white/grey European Shorthair, 6

~*~

Pedigree

Pedigree?? Noooo, not the dog food, hahaha! My family tree...
I've taken up an old hobby, that I once started but never followed through: genealogy! A few years ago I downloaded MyHeritage, free genealogy software.

Lately I've been digging around the WWW. I'm trying to go back in time with both my family line (Van der Heijden and Slotemaker) and Ron's (Van Leeuwen and Verdikt).
I found out someone had already done the research for the Slotemaker family (my mother's family). I imported it in my files and shared some new info from our branch.

(click on the pic to visit the Slotemaker website)

Luckily a lot of archives are accessible online these days. That makes things a lot easier. First I added what I knew myself, then asked family members around me. The Van der Heijden family had been researched already and I got copies. I found the Verdikt family through 'smart matches', a very handy feature of the MyHeritage software. Facebook, Google, specialized genealogy websites and tips & tricks from people who are more experienced in this help me to get further, step by step.

Above is a print-screen image of the MyHeritage software. This is the main part, the tree itself. It is easy to work with, but I haven't discovered all of its possibilities yet. Practice makes perfect. Genealogy is sooooo addictive! Before I realize it I've spent hours searching, digging, asking, etc. And it's never done; there's always more to explore and find out!
If you want to take a look at the "Van Leeuwen - Van der Heijden Stamboom", follow this link.

Mother's Day

I think of you, a little extra today

6th Mother's Day without you

I miss you so much

I send you my love and

I remember you, mom...

Always!

~*~*~*~

If you still have your mom... please cherish her! Forgive her, love her, even with all her vices - like she loves you with all of yours... Because when she's gone for good, you don't want to have any regrets!

I have no regrets; I've talked and shared everything I wanted with my mom. She forgave me (the gods know I haven't always been the easy one...) and thanked me for all I've done for her. She wasn't always easy to deal with too and I've grumbled a lot, but I wouldn't have wanted it any other way. She knew she could always count on me and that was mutual. I wish we had had more time together...

For Joke & Leo - Forever Love

For you, because I believe your love will live on and never leave!

Goodbye Leo...

Yesterday evening completely unexpectedly my brother-in-law Leo passed away (cardiac arrest), only 55 years old... . CPR was done immediately as it happened at the gym. They tried everything possible at the gym, in the ambulance and in the hospital. Alas, it didn't work and Leo was pronounced dead around 10.15pm...

Yesterday afternoon he was with Joke at our home for my birthday, looking forward to go to the gym. Afterwards they would come back here, but instead we left the visitors to go to the gym and later the hospital. Last night and today I stayed with Joke to make all arrangements and for support. I'll be there for her for as long as she wants me to, and thereafter. Tonight she wants to be alone, so I'm home now. I let her promise to call me when she needs me. If she doesn't call, I'll go to her first thing in the morning.

How I wish Tempus (the demon of time) from Charmed really existed to manipulate time and bring back Leo. The thing I want to do most for my sister is the most impossible...

It is so unfair, so cruel, so incomprehensible. Why, why, WHY??? Why Leo???

My brother's wedding

Last Friday my brother Gerard got married to Sylvia. They are together for some years now and they are a good couple. May 15th 2009 they made it (more) official! Gerard looked handsome in his black suit and Sylvia wore a very beautiful ivory bridal gown with a lovely back and a chapel length train. Gerard is a huge Ferrari-fan, so the wedding car was no surprise (except perhaps the colour): a yellow 348 GTB. They made pictures with it on the racetrack at Circuit Park Zandvoort and (without the car) on the beach. A friend of them showed up at their home on a motor, dressed up as a girl. He made a burnout on the parking lot.

When bride and groom walked into the town hall, the local duo "Wel & Wel" welcomed them with a song called "'Eén Simpel Woord" (One Simple Word). The ceremony in the wedding room was beautiful. I missed my parents all day, but right there it brought me to tears. I felt they were present, moved and proud. Next to me on the front row were two empty chairs, their places... Gerard's oldest son Michael was one of the witnesses. Sylvia's son Rick was just too young to be a witness, but the registrar included him in a different way: he did the hammer blow to seal the wedding.

After the ceremony in the town hall everyone drove to the party location. A banner with the theme of the wedding invitation was hanging in the entrance hall. We also made the picture on top of this post there. The room was nicely decorated with doves, hearts and balloons. Instead of a book Michael had made a triptych on which all the visitors could sign their names and wishes.
The party was adorned with local singers of which Ron and I liked "The SoulBrothers" the best by far. We made pictures and enjoyed ourselves. Just after midnight we went home, but I'm sure the party lasted a lot longer. :-)

Reminiscing

The last day of the year... A day to look back, reminisce. Of course my parents are always part of that. Although they weren't there physically in 2008, they are always with me. This picture stands in our living room (without the heart). It reminds me of the good times. It is taken during the opening of christmas presents in our former home. It makes me smile. I love them, I miss them, but I know they love me and I cherish the memories!

Time for me to go now,
I won't say goodbye
Look for me in rainbows,
way up in the sky.

In the morning sunrise
when all the world is new,
Just look for me and love me,
as you know I loved you.

Time for me to leave you,
I won't say goodbye
Look for me in rainbows,
high up in the sky.

In the evening sunset,
when all the world is through,
Just look for me and love me,
and I'll be close to you.

It won't be forever,
the day will come and then
My loving arms will hold you,
when we meet again.

Time for us to part now,
we won't say goodbye
Look for me in rainbows,
shining in the sky.

Every waking moment,
and all your whole life through
Just look for me and love me,
as you know I loved you.

Just wish me
to be near you,
and I'll be there with you

sung by Vicky Brown

TT #92: update

Thirteen things about my life at the moment I haven’t been participating in TT for quite some time. A lot has happened and I just didn’t have or make the time, so this week an update will be suitable. The holiday season has started. Yesterday afternoon I finished writing the holiday cards. The tree is up, but nothing’s in it yet… Ron’s nephew and his wife added a new baby to the family yesterday. It’s a healthy little girl called Iris Sophia. We haven’t paid a visit yet, but we will soon! Talking of family news… My brother and his girlfriend are engaged to be married! The big day will take place in May next year. On December 24th I will go to the hospital to have my xanthelasmata removed in surgery. My what??? Haha! They are a sharply demarcated yellowish collection of cholesterol underneath the skin on my eyelids. It’s hereditary, my whole family has them. They are harmless and painless, but disfiguring and awful looking. Ron gave me the best holiday gift ever: a leather-bound, 5 cm (2 inch) thick Book of Shadows, filled with recycled parchment-look paper. I love it! This weekend (probably Sunday) Ron and I will go to the Midwinterfair again in theme park Archeon. It is for the 6th time and I’ve been there since 2004. It’s a mix of fantasy, paganism, middle-ages, Celts, etc. with stands, demonstrations, live action role-playing, storytellers, bands and lots more. Ron got very bad news from his boss. After two years of burn-out he was building up to fulltime working again. He felt good and enjoyed being active again. He was told they were looking for a good place for him within the company to make full use of his knowledge and experience. Well… not really… Last week he had a personal talk with the after sales manager and the head of the personnel department. They evaded to say it literally, but there is no longer place for him with the company. They’ll at least pay for outplacement guidance. To make it even worse, his salary will decrease with hundreds of euro’s, with retrospective effect from September… This coming Sunday Ron and I will be married for 13 years. We are together for much longer (22 years), but that cold day in December 1995 will always be a warm and loving memory. It was a great day! Ron is very happy to have his sisters and their families back after the death of his mother. Although I had my reservations at first because of the past, I must say I like it too. They seem to accept and respect me now. It still feels fragile to me at times, but that’s okay. The aftercare self-help groups we were trying to start in Haarlem and surroundings didn’t work out. Although we were told all the time that there was a big need for these groups and we made a lot of publicity, the applications failed to come. Just a few people wanted to join in. After two years of trying we decided to take a long break. The motivation faded; a lot of work and almost no response. We’ll give it a try again later. This afternoon Ron has an appointment in the Sudor clinic, specialised in hyperhidrosis (excessive perspiration). He has tried all the available tips and treatments, but it never really helped. This clinic does surgery, thoracoscopic sympathectomy, in which part of the nerve is burned. The success percentage is 98 %. I spend a lot of time on Facebook. Staying in touch with people I know, but also playing the games. I have a virtual fairy garden, blue cove with fish, an army of snowmen, a green patch and lots more. I play word games, vampire hunting, slot machines, etc. I exchange all sorts of gifts with my friends. I save animals and square feet of rainforest (for real because of game sponsors). Everything is free! In short: I’m addicted! ;-) Next Wednesday I’ll have my appointments with the cardiologist and internist of the chronic fatigue centre. I hope I’ll hear more about what they can do for me. ~*~*~*~ The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted

Welcome to my world

Sometimes you hear a song and suddenly you are back in time. While doing all kinds of things on the computer I had my mediaplayer set on random when I heard Jim Reeves singing "Welcome to my world".
Within seconds I was sitting in my childhood living room, talking and making cryptograms with my dad. He was a big fan of Jim Reeves and he transferred it to me. Just like he did with the Rat Pack, although dad liked Sinatra best and I was more fond of Dean Martin. He liked more modern music too though. He watched "Toppop" and "Countdown" (Dutch shows, comparable with Top of the Pops) with me. We commented the songs together, but didn't always agree. :-)
I know I've inherited a lot from my dad, like the music preferences, love for puzzling esp. cryptograms, being good with figures & numbers and more virtues & vices. We had a great bond and I still miss him so much. If only I could talk with him again, hug him and tell him how much I love him. I guess he knows, I know he knows.
I have a 16CD box of Jim Reeves in my files. I just want to listen and reminisce for a while longer...

Welcome to my world
Won't you come on in
Miracles I guess
Still happen now and then
Step into my heart
Leave your cares behind
Welcome to my world
Built with you in mind

Knock and the door will open
Seek and you will find
Ask and you'll be given
The key to this world of mine
I'll be waiting here
With my arms unfurled
Waiting just for you
Welcome to my world

Waiting just for you
Welcome to my world

Best dad in the world

Today would have been my father's 73rd birthday. The last one we celebrated was his 61st though... The 4th day of the 4th month; he always picked 4 as his lucky number!
I still think of him every day, still miss him. I know he's with me in spirit, but I'd love to talk to him and give him a hug for real just once... To me he'll always be the best dad in the world. O sure, you could probably argue that he wasn't and why, but that doesn't matter. He wasn't a saint and I don't idealize him. He had his virtues and vices, so do I (some the same!). He was who he was and to me that is the best dad in the world. I'm so glad Ron has known him very good too, so we could reminisce together today.
♥ I love you, dad! ♥