Thursday, January 11, 2007

TT #24: in my past

Thirteen things from my past

Yes, that's me in the header; taken in 1976! Get to know me a bit better by reading about the past. Here is a random selection of things that made me into the person I am today.

  • In the first class (when I was 6) I wore glasses with one eye covered. I have a lazy eye, but the glasses didn't work. I hated them and they were hideous too. I have one picture of me wearing them, but that's still packed somewhere.
  • My brother Gerard and I had a love-hate relationship during the time we both lived with our parents. He is 6 years older and we argued all the time. Very harsh sometimes, but when one of us was away we missed the other terribly. And when something happened to me, he stood up for me like my "big brother"; don't touch his little sis! We drove mum and dad crazy.
  • I have been a majorette for more than 10 years. I loved twirling and was very good in it. I also was the instructor for the younger group. And... I met Ron there, who played drums in the drumband!
  • I liked school very much. I have always been the best of the class with high marks without too much effort. That made me proud but it also caused a lot of stress for me, because I didn't want to "fail". The perfectionist in me prevailed.
  • When I was a child, I often came home with wounded birds and other little animals. I even got angry when my mum killed a fly or ant. Needless to say I still love animals that much, all animals!
  • I remember playing in our street when I was about 3. Suddenly a car (a Beetle) appeared and hit me, but stopped just in time. The image that remains is that I'm lying on the ground watching the bumper of the beetle. I wasn't hurt, just had a few scratches.
  • I was a father's child. He could answer all my questions (and I asked a lot!) and when he couldn't he helped me find the answer elsewhere. Later he was waiting for me after school with a cup of tea. He knew perfectly when to ask further and when to be silent. We watched sports together, discussed just about everything and made cryptograms together.
  • I also loved my mother very much, but with her I did other things: shopping, visits, etc. We were both early birds and in the morning she often helped me with my homework. She pronounced the words exactly as they were written. Her pronunciation of French, English and German sounded hilarious and we laughed about it a lot. But it worked and I always knew how to write the words!
  • When my sister Joke was 18 (and I was 8) she moved out to live together with Leo. I often stayed with them for the weekend, first in Beverwijk, later in Haarlem. I always enjoyed myself very much. My mum and dad didn't have their license, so Leo's car was the first in our family. When they got married in 1980 I was bridesmaid.
  • I've had issues with food and my weight for as long as I can remember. I can't say exactly when it became an eating-disorder. I have had anorexia, bulimia, binge-eating disorder and mixtures of them. I've been obese, skinny and everything in between. I've been addicted to laxatives. I tried all kinds of self-help and therapies. Finally, when I was 32, the breakthrough came when I checked myself into a specialized clinic in Amsterdam. I never say I'm cured, but I can handle it and know what to do when I'm going the wrong way.
  • When I was a teenager I looked older than I really was. I often had older friends. My boyfriends were always older. I had more, but before Ron I only had a few serious relationships. I got engaged with Arie, my dancing partner. We were together for two to three years, but he cheated on me with (what I thought was) a friend. I was devastated.
  • When I was 13 or 14 I was raped. Horrible, but I've had great help. I'll never forget it, but I have given it a place. Unfortunately the perpetrators have never been caught. About a year later I lost my real virginity to a very special friend in a wonderful and loving way. He knew about the rape and made me feel very special.
  • After school I wanted to go to university to study English and/or Dutch, but that wasn't possible financially. I decided to step in my father's footsteps. He was a book-keeper/accountant. I started to work 4 days (for KPMG) and go to school 1 day to become a registered accountant. I loved the work. Unfortunately a few years into it I had to stop because of my depression and eating-disorders.


Links to other Thursday Thirteens!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


  1. TINKERBELL: Wow... what a revealing post. I also wore glasses with one eye covered and it did not work. I know how difficult it is to open up. Thanks

  2. It sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with your parents and brohter. I was sorry to read of the rape, and can not imagine how horrible that was for you. Thank you for being so open and sharing so much of yourself with your readers. i enjoyed this post.

  3. what a cutie pie you were and what a life you had. thanks for revealing more of yourself.
    my tt is up.

  4. A very good list. Very interesting.

    My 13 are up.

  5. I'm sorry about the rape. But overall, you seem to have such a beautiful life.

    Still want to take English or Dutch now?

  6. That was such a great post and such an open pouring out of yourself. Just a lot of "wow" in there. Sounds like you had a strong but different relationship with each of your parents, and that probably helped a lot with the other things. Great thirteen :)

  7. Wow, thank you for sharing all those details with us. So sorry to read about the rape and the eating disorders. You are clearly a very strong person to have lived through them.

    I can relate to your experiences with being at the top of the class and not wanting to fail. I was the same way.

    Thanks again for letting us have these glimpses into your past. Take care.

  8. Great memories of your past.
    Mine is up too.

  9. Anonymous11/1/07 12:21

    Wow, such a moving post. I'm glad you have such a wonderful family and caring friends, and I'm so sorry to hear of the rape. How horrible. You've been through a lot, and you sound like a wise, wonderful person. Happy TT to you! And thanks for visiting my TT. :)

  10. HI Tink
    I'm so happy you visited my blog so I could get to know you. I also had a lazy eye (it's a TRUE SIGN OF THE WITCH you know) and had to wear those stupid glasses with the patch. I hope that you know that the Goddess is with you and you can call upon Her for strength to deal with those difficult issues in your life.
    many blessings
    Lady V
    ps I love your profile photo:)

  11. Hi Tink. Thanks for visiting my blog. You have a very interesting list - it was good to get to know you a little.

  12. What a lot of intense memories! It's not hard to see that you're a strong person because of them.

  13. Tink--thank you for sharing so much with us. I share the food struggle also.

  14. Thank you so much for sharing, Tink. It's great to get to know you better. *huge hugs*

  15. Awww Tinks..First thing ((Hug))
    You have been through a lot and it sounds like you are strong and have dealt with your issues head on. Your parents and siblings sound wonderful.
    Thank you for sharing.
    Have a wonderful Thursday
    My TT is posted

  16. Your TT touched me very much. I know what depressions are I had them for many years. I didn't have eating problems but drinking problems. It really takes a lot of time to get out of hell. Now I am happy with my life and hope it will last until I look at the flowers from beneath !

  17. Hey Tink - thanks for sharing the emotional highs and lows of your past.
    I have a sister 6 years older and we weren't close until we were both grown and married. Now she's a good friend.

  18. Very personal T13! Thanks for sharing.

  19. It sounds like life has thrown a lot your way. It's so great to hear that you've been able to deal with every hurtle. I wish you all the best!

  20. Wow, that was really interesting. I am a "Daddy's girl" too.

  21. Wow, you've been through a lot!

  22. Wow. You're darn brave to put some of that out there, Tink. I really admire you for doing it.

    Happy TT!

  23. I enjoyed reading about your past. Thank you for dropping by my blog. My mother was a wise woman. Sadly she died 5 years ago.

  24. Great list...always interesting to read about other bloggers lives and how they became the people they are today. Happy Thursday!

  25. That had to have been a tough post to write. Thanks for sharing =)

  26. it's so important to have support and help when something really terrible happens.

  27. awesome thirteen... sometimes it's great to look back, isn't it?

    i was in the color guard when i was in high school... i LOVED it, and i completely understand your love of being a majorette!

  28. Great Blog, Tink! Thanks for sharing! You and I seem to have a lot in common. Sometime when you have some extra moments..come read some of my past. You and I are survivors!!!!! HUGS!

  29. Your dad sounds like a great guy,

  30. What a very soulful post. I know how hard and therapeutic opening up to strangers can be. Happy TT.

  31. I love your storie with your mum and the prononciation of french !!! :-)

    Happy TT !!!
    Thanks for visiting me !!! :-)

  32. Thanks for sharing, that took loads and loads of guts!

  33. what a survivor you are. and couragous! sharing that took as much courage as living through it. i wish i had half as much.

  34. Ik ben best geschrokken van deze TT moet ik eerlijk zeggen, en ik vind dat je heel dapper bent om dit te vertellen.

  35. Wow, I sure did learn alot about you from this post. I had a lazy eye as a child, but it healed itself without glasses and a patch. My best friend had the glasses and patch though !!
    Hope you have a great weekend.
    Take care, Meow

  36. Tink--

    I enjoyed your post--lots of things have happened to you. Your family sounds very special. No wonder you miss your parents--

    I am sorry to hear about the rape and your eating disorder and depression. I believe you could find comfort in God.

  37. It is quite special to be treated to glimpses of a person's past. Nice that you had so many strong relationships around you.


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