Body In Balance – My Lipoedema Journey

Lipoedema is a chronic, progressive condition that has affected my body and daily life, both physically and mentally, for many years. Despite all the self-care, treatments and lifestyle choices I make, liposuction is the only realistic way for me to achieve genuine relief in the form of greater mobility and significantly reduced or even eliminated chronic pain. Unfortunately, this treatment is still not covered by health insurance in the Netherlands, and it doesn't look like that will change in the near future. This feels deeply unfair, but dwelling on anger and disappointment won't help me. 

After careful consideration, we have decided to fund the surgery ourselves. The first treatment is already scheduled! We have set aside/borrowed money for this, but it does make us more vulnerable financially. This is why I have started a crowdfunding campaign. Asking for help is a bit scary, but being honest is even more important: I cannot do this alone. Every contribution helps to ease the financial burden and makes the journey a little more manageable. Every donation, whether big or small, moves me closer to a body that feels balanced again. 

As you've come to expect from me, I'll be posting regular explanations and updates to keep you informed. I'll do that on the crowdfunding page and in more detail on my other blog “Body In Balance – My Lipoedema Journey”. 

‘Lipedema Heroes Tinkerbell’ by Flore Carvas @fc.lipoedeme

An Open Letter To Robbie Williams

Hi Rob!

 Let me start by congratulating you on a very well-deserved Brit Icon Award! As you noticed last night in the Troxy and on social media, we (the friendlies) are very proud of you! I couldn’t come, but I watched video’s and read stories of my fellow-friendlies that were there. I can’t wait to see the show on tv, or perhaps dvd / blu-ray?

 Let me take you on a little journey… I’ve been following you ever since you left Take That. I always say: I like TT’s music, I love Rob’s. :-)
In 2003 I had tickets for the tour but I got a nasty flu and wasn’t able to go. Needless to say I was bummed! In 2006 I got tickets again and yay, it was time to go to my first ever Robbie Williams concert! Then a week before that, my mum died unexpectedly… I was devastated and unable to queue at the time my friends and I had planned. But thanks to my fellow-friendlies (then called F-gang for Forum-gang, your RW-forum) I could come a bit later to queue and they got me the best possible spot in the venue, right in the middle in front of the stage, in front of you. Just as my mum would have wanted I had a great time!
I also went to the live broadcast of The BBC Proms in 2009, the Take That & Robbie concert in 2011 and the Take The Crown Tour in 2013.
 In 2014 I bought tickets for the Swings Both Ways concert in Amsterdam. I was so happy when I won the Upfront Meet & Greet on May 4th! I went there with my husband; remember the tall guy that made you stand on tip-toes? ;-) You almost ignored us at first because you thought we were just from the record company, but then made up for it big time. We all laughed when your security guy accidentally put out the lights. We chatted and thoroughly enjoyed the time you spent with us, and the concert was great too of course!
When the LMEY-tour was announced we heard it would be different venues and festivals. In The Netherlands you came to Pinkpop. Unfortunately I have some medical issues that make me unable to stand for a longer period of time, so I knew I couldn’t make it there. My budget didn’t allow me to travel abroad to go to one of the concerts there that did have seated tix. Of course I was a bit disappointed but I still enjoyed it by watching you on Periscope while chatting with other friendlies on Upfront and by video’s, pics and stories of others. There were already rumours of a new album and a real stadium-tour in 2017 so I promised myself I’d definitely see you there!

That brings me to the present day. The last week it was Robbie-time! :-) I tried to get tix for the intimate gigs/tv-things you did over here in The Netherlands. No luck, not a problem. I watched you on tv and liked it almost as much! I got the new album and I really love it! I put my holiday plans for 2017 on hold in anticipation of the announcement of the HES-tour dates. Yesterday I was anxiously checking your website, Upfront, Ticketmaster, Twitter, etc. And YAY, finally… they were there! I was surprised to see Nijmegen in the list, but anywhere in our country would be okay. The Goffert Stadium is beautiful and a great place for a concert. Then I suddenly noticed it said GoffertPARK. O no… that’s an outside venue, just a green field in a park. I really don’t understand why they chose these venues and not one of the many suitable stadiums in The Netherlands: Arena, Kuip, there are many… Is it too much to ask for stadiums on a stadium tour? I don’t think so… I’m just a genuine long-time fan that wants to go to the concert! Belgium got the same with Werchter. This means no seated tickets… I won’t be able to go… Again… I felt sooo disappointed… gutted, in pain even. :-(

Years ago you asked me and my fellow-friendlies to grow old with you. I said YES then and I still say YES today with all of my heart and soul. But you know, when people get older some get little infirmities, ailments, medical issues. More than that, even young people too… Not always too serious thank gods, but still stopping them from doing what they were used to. No Inner Pits for me and that’s a shame, but I still enjoy the concerts! Yes, I need a seat, but I won’t stay on it for long. I dance, I cheer, I even jump, but in between that I just need to sit down for a while. And I’m not the only one. I’ve read several similar sentiments everywhere.

Please don’t get me wrong, I don’t blame you! I know you probably don’t hand-pick the venues, you’ll have people for it, and that makes perfect sense of course. But perhaps you could have a talk with them…? So maybe next time, next tour it could be different. In the meantime I’ll be looking into possibilities to see if I can manage to do a concert with seated places in Germany. A girl can try, can’t she? ;-)
I understand you can’t do a lot right now for this tour, but you’ve always been open and honest with us friendlies so I thought I’d return the favour.

Much love, Cora (TinkNL on Upfront)

Missing Foofur

I miss him so much...
I missed his weight on my feet in bed last night
I miss his tripping on the laminate flooring
I miss his little nose touching my hand
I think of all the things we did together and smile
I think of all the future things he'll miss and cry
I miss his comfort now that I'm so sad...
I'm happy I meant so much to him
I regret the times I got impatient
I'm so proud of my big little friend
I cry because there's only one dog barking when the door bell rings...
I miss a part of me
I miss you, Foofie.. ♥

For more than 16 years he was my buddy. I can't imagine myself and life without him... Everything around me reminds me of him. So many people knew and loved him. I am very thankful for all the support and comfort people give us, but still I can't stop crying.
I know he misses me too, he didn't want to leave me yesterday... I know it was the right decision. He didn't deserve to suffer after all the love he gave us so unconditionally. He was always there for me and shared so many good and bad times. He forgave me when I snapped at him because he understood it wasn't about him at all. I always apologized to him after something like that. I know he understands and forgives me but I still feel bad in retrospective. I meant the world to him and he to me.
When he was our only dog I took him with me everywhere. And even when we had more dogs I took only him with me to meetings. People rarely minded, because he was such a sweet and lovable dog. He was friendly to everyone: people, dogs, cats, other animals... He knew how to attract everyone's attention, but was also happy to just sleep in my lap or somewhere close when I was busy doing other things.

I know he'll miss me too and hope he'll come to visit me. I imagine my mum and my brother-in-law waiting for him on the other side. He loved them and they'll spoil him for me until I meet him and all the others at the rainbow bridge. He'll meet all the cats again that shared our life and his. When we got him we had 9 cats and they raised him too. He had some cat-like habits like the way he washed himself, sitting in the window sill and other silly stuff. He knew I loved the cats so he loved them too. They often slept as one pile of pets around me. Foofur never minded to share my attention, he knew he was special anyway...

I've written about him a lot. He is mentioned very often in my blog and on my social media accounts. That's only logical as he is such a major part of my life. Was? No, IS and will always be.
I'd like to share just some of the posts here...

• Feb. 12, 2015 Happy Birthday Foofur - his last birthday, his 16th
• Feb. 13, 2014 Foofur's Birthday - his 15th
• Feb. 5, 2012 Finally Winter! - Foofur hated rain but he shared my love for snow!
• Aug. 22, 2011 Foofur & Arwen in the dunes - with a video of them
• June 7, 2009 Dogs at the beach - pics, with Boris
• Feb. 12, 2009 Foofur's 10th birthday! - with (photo-shopped) birthday hat
• Jan. 12, 2009 Look what I won! - Leanne Wildermuth's portrait of Foofur
• July 31, 2008 Vote for Foofur! - photo competition (he won!)
• Jan. 8, 2008 Cats & dogs - Foofur and the cats
• and so much more posts and mentions...

Rest in peace, Foofur
Feb. 12, 1999 - June 2, 2015

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Farewell to Foofur....

Foofur has left the building....
Today we had to make that dreaded decision... 
heart emoticon  Rest in peace, my sweet little friend... heart emoticon
We love you, forever...
I can't stop crying, I miss him so much...

Update and PaganPages

I've been absent and I haven't even wished you a happy new year... Sorry! A lot has happened. I've had some issues with a new medicine for my blood pressure. I worked to lower the pressure, but I never felt worse! I tried it for a month, but we (GP and I) decided to stop. That was two weeks ago. Now I feel somewhat better, but my blood pressure is sky high again. So we'll continue to try and find new solutions to do something about it. All in all I've been out of the running for 4 to 6 weeks. Enough is enough. To be continued!

In between all this Ron is switching from paid employment to starting for himself. Same job though, transport guidance / pilot service. That way he can work more hours and hopefully make more money. :-) So this is an exciting but stressful time. Wish us luck!

~*~*~*~

PaganPages is an online magazine or e-zine about all things pagan. The February Issue is up now!

In my column I've shared some of my personal Imbolc traditions.
You can read it here: Tink About It: My Imbolc traditions

Farewell to Aims

Amy Louise Cartwright 
August 13, 1983 - August 21, 2014

Last week I got a message from a friend, that our mutual friend Amy had died peacefully in her sleep. It was a big shock, she was just 31... 

We all got to know each other online in the original Robbie Williams forum on his website years ago. We called ourselves the F-gang (forum-gang) and had almost daily contact as regular posters there. We had a lot of fun, but also discussed serious matters and supported each other through good and bad times. Amy, or Aims as we knew her, was the only one that lived in Stoke, Robbie's place of birth. She happily sent out postcards and shared the recipe for oatmeal cookies, a local snack. She was ever there with a friendly word, advice or virtual hug for everyone. She talked about Robbie, her life and her passion for hamsters. On her birthday and for X-mas I always tried to get her a card with hamsters...

In 2005 I met Aims for the first time when she traveled to The Netherlands for the first F-gang meeting. It was a lovely weekend with a group of friends.
In 2006 a smaller group came together for a few days to go to the Robbie Williams concert in London (later transferred to Milton Keynes). Aims booked a room for all of us in a youth hostel behind Tavistock Place. At the concert we met a few others. We had a great time together, both in London and at the concert! Read my report here.

Although the old forum doesn't exist anymore I always kept in contact with Aims (and other F-gangers). First by e-mail and later on Facebook. Not frequent, but on a regular basis. We also exchanged birthday and x-mas cards, though we both missed a few. That was never a problem, lives get busy. A few weeks ago I almost forgot her birthday and placed a card on her wall. I didn't know her Facebook profile had been hacked some time ago and she didn't spend much time there. The next thing I heard was the sad, sad news of her passing...

I really wanted to go to the funeral to pay my respects and give my condolences to her family and friends. Unfortunately I can't afford to go. The F-gang and other friends from the forum got together and we decided to raise money for a flower arrangement and a donation to a charity in her honour.
Around the world several people will light a candle today at the time of her funeral, and again next week for the woodland burial of her cremated remains. Some of us also lit a candle online here.

Rest in peace, Aims....

as Robbie sings it: 

You're one of God's better people 

And you don't know 

That's why you're special

You were a truly special, amazing woman

who touched the hearts of everyone who knew you

You'll be missed

gone but not forgotten

~*~*~*~*~*~

PaganPages September

PaganPages is an online magazine or e-zine about all things pagan. The September Issue is up now!
There are lots of interesting articles, interviews, reviews, etc.

This time I wrote about 'my' goddess Skaði: how she came into my life, what I know about her, etc.
You can read it here: Tink About It: Skaði

Wake Skadi by Hagalaz Runedance

In the winter mountains high,
Where avalanches roar and frozen lakes sigh
The sough of the wind to hear
The howl of the wolves sweet tune to her ear
Wake Skadi, come patroness
Guide me through your crystal woods

Silvery goddess of the snow,
Your shining beauty melts the cold
Dress me in your white shawl
Kindle my fierce passions
Wake Skadi, proud northern giantess
I invoke your strength

Mistress of the hunt,
Raise the spirit of freedom
Led your sisters into the chase,
Arouse their untamed nature
Wake Skadi; light the flames of courage,
Wake your sisters' will to fight

Sister of wolves,
Seek your companions
You heard the call of the wild
I summon your instinct
Wake Skadi, defend your kind
Guard them from the hateful hand of the blind

Final Friday

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 27
On our final Friday of the year, let's share a little bit about the year that was 2013 by answering the questions.

~*~*~*~

Are you sure? I didn't write a lot in 2013 and before, because I didn't want to fill this blog with depression, misery and rants. Read on at your own risk...

1. What will you remember about 2013?
Surviving instead of living, depression, poverty, unhappiness, powerlessness, sadness, distress, stress... Seeing my better half feeling the same way, crying together, pulling each other up again in desperation...

2. What are you ready to leave behind?
see most of answer to question 1

3. What's something you learned in 2013? 
Life goes on, even if you don't want it to most of the time.
If you think you hit rock bottom, there's always another floor underneath to sink to.
Together we are strong and we are stronger than we think.

4. What would you like to celebrate about this past year?
I had to think long and hard to find an answer. It's not that we didn't do nice things, it's not that we were never happy in 2013. Of course there were moments to be thankful for, and we definitely are, but they disappeared quickly because it couldn't counterbalance the misery. It does help to survive though!
What I do want to mention is that we are very thankful for all the wonderful people we have around us that helped and are still helping us survive this ordeal. Whether it is a lit candle, an arm around us or substantial material help doesn't matter. We value them all and are very lucky and happy to have people like that we can count on.

Pfew, I managed to end on a positive note.
Can't wait for 2014: new year, new chances!

found on Facebook

10 things in my bag

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 19
Inspired by one of Jamie's most popular videos in which she shared what's in her purse, we thought we'd ask... What are 10 Things Currently In Your Bag?

~*~*~*~

I made a picture to show you the inside of my hand bag:

1. brown leather purse and coin dispenser
2. retractable umbrella
3. keys with mini-Leatherman and car-key (in black pouch)
4. pocket torch
5. deodorant
6. mobile phone
7. hairbrush and scrunchie
8. nail file & cutter
9. lip balm, arnica gel and herbal healing salve
10. sweeteners (normal and stevia)

Make a wish

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 18
Yesterday I didn't have time to join, but I'm back. :)
Today's prompt is in honour of the first meme that Jamie Ridler ever created: Wishcasting. There is magic in wishing together. Today, make a wish.

~*~*~*~

That's an easy one...
I wish for a lasting, structural solution to our financial crisis. Whether it's from winning the lottery or the right job for Ron or anything else, I don't care (an' it harm none!).

"As you wish for yourself so I wish for you also."

...and then you forget to publish the concept-post... way to go, Tink! I really want to bring this wish into the universe again, so I posted it a day later... The universe won't mind. ;-))

18th anniversary

Today is our 18th wedding anniversary...

Together for 25+ years...

True love...

And he still gives me butterflies...    

(I just found out the 18th anniversary is called the turquoise anniversary - a beautiful gem!)

10 things I know for sure

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 12
Today's prompt: "A Truth? A Constant? A Wisdom to Share? Your Superpower? What Are Ten Things You Know For Sure?"

~*~*~*~

10 things I know for sure in no particular order... I'm sure there's more, but these are the ones that came out today. Are they truths? Some universal, some just to me.

1. The only thing that is constant is change.
2. The pagan path is the right path for me.
3. A house is not a home without books and pets.
4. Love is a verb, always keep on communicating and trying to improve.
5. I believe in the power of magic and the power of love.
6. Depression and eating disorders are illnesses, not weaknesses.
7. I will never know everything I want to know.
8. Everything happens for a reason, but nothing is guaranteed.
9. Everyone has a right to choose how to live (and die).
10. I will die.

What Makes You Weepy

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 11
Yesterday we were 'on the road' all day to Germany and back, so I didn't have time for KIOS, but I'm jumping right back in again!

Today's question is: "What makes you weepy?"

~*~*~*~

Onions make me cry, but that's just a physical reaction. Romance, children... nah, sorry, no cry. What really makes me weepy is happiness. Little things, major things... happy is weepy! :)

Weeping in sadness, yes that too. Especially when animals are ill-treated, abused, left behind and that kind of thing. It makes me very angry, but also cry for the poor souls... Although I can cry from anger too, for example when I feel I'm treated unjustly.

Listening to music can make me weepy too, for a variety of reasons. Often sadness as certain songs remind me of people that are no longer among us. Listening to 'their' music can make me feel close to them again. Music helps to remember... Sometimes I listen to songs on purpose to get the tears going; that can be very healing. Except for songs with a history there's music I like to listen to when I'm sad; I have a sad playlist on YouTube. My favourite classical sad music (sounds strange, but true) is Pavane by Gabriel Fauré (for orchestra or with voice - in this case Barbra Streisand).

Movies rarely make me cry, but there are scenes that bring tears to my eyes. Let me think... Ah yes, the end scene of 'Ghost', when Two Socks gets hurt in 'Dances With Wolves', when Rose has to let go of Jack in 'Titanic' and more I guess. Sometimes it catches me by surprise, but I'm not ashamed of it.

10 Things About Me

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 5
Today's idea is a classic, simple as that: "Tell Us 10 Things About You". Sounds easy peasy, but is it? What to tell? Try not to state the obvious, or perhaps I should exactly do that. 10 things, pfew... Let me think...

~*~*~*~

If you don't know me yet, I'll share 10 things you should at least know about me...

If you do know me, can you predict which things I'm going to share in this list? Stop reading, make a list and tell me afterwards how many you had correct. :)

1. I'm married to the love of my life, Ron. Next Saturday is our 18th wedding anniversary, but we are together for more than 25 years. We met at a local marching band: he was on drums, I was a majorette/twirler. And the rest as they say is history... and present, and future! :)
2. I'm pagan, more precisely I call myself an eclectic heathen witch. Interested why or what that means to me? Read more here and of course you'll find lots of pagan stuff on this blog.
3. I'm a Robbie Williams fan ever since he left Take That back in the day. I have all his albums, dvd's and more. I've been to several concerts. This year I went to his Take The Crown Tour and just yesterday I scored tickets for his Swings Both Ways Tour next year. Woohoo! :) Read my posts about him here.
4. I love reading, I love books. I have a lot of books; you can see a small portion (appr. 1200 of them...) in my LibraryThing. I breathe books, like the smell, sound, feel, etc. of real books. My all time favourite book is The Lord Of The Rings, but there's so much more...
5. I'm a Trekkie! Love, love, love Star Trek. I like The Original Series and love the rest. I have all seasons of The Next Generation, Voyager and Deep Space Nine and all movies on dvd. I would love to have Enterprise too. Years ago I've been on television talking about Star Trek. That same day I've met Patrick Stewart, my favourite actor (not only as Capt. Picard).
6. I'm very fond of (all!) animals. I'm a cat-lover and a dog-lover. Some say you can't be both, but I am. We share our home with 3 cats (Freyja, Bastet & Maia - goddess names) and two dogs (Foofur, a crossbreed Welsh Corgi / Jack Russell, and Arwen, a Bernese Mountaindog). Read and see more of them here on my blog.
7. In the past I have been struggling with eating disorders and depression. For some years now I use my experience to help others. I tell my story, educate and give information to different groups of people: teenagers, students, fellow-sufferers, nurses, etc. I coach social workers and medical professionals in how to be of real help to a patient on the way to recovery by showing them a different point of view. 
8. I'm a computer-addict. :) Internet, social media, downloading, digital photography and lots, lots more. I like to learn and try out new things. It's my window to the world.
9. I love all seasons, but especially winter. Snow, ice, cold sunny weather... I've written about that yesterday, so I'll leave it at that here.
10. I like to make herbal home remedies. I'm a reiki master. I make my own candles. Ron and I brew mead. I collect Dutch stamps. I miss my mum and dad. I'm a hobby-genealogist. There's always more to know... And yes, I know this is cheating. ;-))

Weather Wednesday

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 4
Today we talk about the weather. Wherever we are, whatever we do, we all experience the weather. It's one of the ways we connect to nature and often to one another when we first meet and engage in casual conversation. It's such a part of where we live and even who we are!

~*~*~*~

If you know me (or even if you have only been reading here for the first KIOS-days), you know that I love winter weather: snow, ice, cold.... Yay!

I'll quote a part of my column in PaganPages about the seasons (read the whole thing here):
"Even as a child I had a preference for cold over heat, hence winter over summer. Even though I could handle heat much better than I’m able to now, I loved winter more. Cold, ice and… snow! Playing outside in the snow, ice-skating on the frozen waters… A healthy Dutch winter girl! We had longer and colder winters back then, some 35 years ago. When everybody was fed up with it after weeks of snow, I only wanted more. Well, nothing has changed there!"

I just made this my new Facebook-cover:

source: Desktop Nexus

It shows my favourite weather: sunny, blue sky, snow and icy cold. :)

Every year when it's getting colder, the speculations start in The Netherlands whether it will be cold enough to have an "Elfstedentocht" (Eleven Cities Tour) this winter. It's a 200 km long skating tour (a speed skating match and a leisure tour) on natural ice in the province of Friesland. It's a huge event and I'd love to see it again. The last one took place in 1997, so it's about time we get a new (16th) edition this winter! *fingers crossed*

Colours & Swap

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 3
Today an 'old skool swap' is announced and we talk about colours. I won't be able to participate in the swap this time, but here are the colours!

~*~*~*~

[ RED ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of red? love
Closest red thing to you? cd-cover of Swings Both Ways (deluxe version)
What is the last thing that made you angry? fireworks in the street (poor pets...)
Are you a fan of romance? in real life yes, movies and books not so much
Do you have a temper? sure, at times

[ GREEN ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of green? nature
Closest green thing to you? little jade polar bear
What's your favourite green environment? park, woods, forest...
Are you jealous of anyone right now? nope
Are you a lucky person? in some ways

[ PURPLE ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of purple? ...
Closest purple thing to you? wool hat of a Harrods christmas-bear
Do you like being treated like royalty? no, with love and respect is good enough
Do you like mysterious things? yes!
Are you intuitive? yes, a lot

[ BLUE ]
What's the first thing you think of when you think of blue? sky
Closest blue thing to you? my sweater
Are you good at calming people down? they say so...
What's your favourite body of water (i.e. lake, ocean, etc)? all, water is my favourite element 
What was the last thing that made you cry? music that reminded me of someone I lost
Are you a logical thinker? yes

[ YELLOW ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of yellow? sun
Closest yellow thing to you? notebook
What was one of the happiest times of your life? my wedding day
What's your favourite holiday? all pagan holidays, but esp. Samhain - Yule - Imbolc
What makes you happy? having no major worries

[ PINK ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of pink? Yuk! I hate pink.
Closest pink thing to you? nothing, yay! let's keep it that way
What sweet things do you like? chocolate
Are you sensitive? yes, very
What is your favourite flower? any flower in nature (please not in a vase to die for me)
Does you have a crush on someone? yes, my hubby!

[ ORANGE ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of orange? Netherlands (our national colour)
Closest orange thing to you? plastic bag
Do you dress up for Halloween? no
What gives you the warm fuzzies? puppies, kittens, other animals
What would your superpower be? invisibility would be nice

[ BROWN ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of brown? chocolate
Closest brown thing to you? statue of a horse
What is your favourite type of chocolate? Koeienvlekjes (cow spots) by Milka
What makes you feel grounded? being outside in nature
Paint the wood or always leave it au naturel? au naturel

[ WHITE ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of white? snow
Closest white thing to you? paper
Do you always try to keep the peace? not all the time anymore, but when possible
Do you like to play in the snow? YES, I love snow!
Are you afraid of going to the doctors or dentist? nope

[ BLACK ] 
What's the first thing you think of when you think of black? night
Closest black thing to you? my mobile phone
Are you sophisticated or silly? mainly silly :-)
Do you have a lot of secrets? not a lot, but secrets... yes
What's the new black? black

Time Capsule

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Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 2
Today we are capturing this moment in time by answering a few questions. So let's start!

~*~*~*~

What are you reading?
I'm always reading multiple books, so here are the ones for now:

• The Fishing Widow by Amy K. Marshall - I got it for free through LibraryThing Early Reviewers Giveaway and I like it a lot! I'll write a review later.
• Heilige bronnen in de Lage Landen by various authors, a Dutch book about reclaiming holy wells in the Lowlands. I attended the book presentation last Saturday.
• and there's more: a thriller by Jo Nesbo, several pagan reverence books and some magazines.

What are you watching?
Besides my all-time favourite Star Trek there are several tv-series I like: Criminal Minds, The Mentalist, NCIS, CSI, Bones, Castle.... and so much more. We recently watched Under The Dome. I also like movies, documentaries, detectives... really too much to sum up here. Did I tell you I love television and dvd..?

What are you listening to?
In my car, computer and cd-player there's one cd on repeat... Swings Both Ways by Robbie Williams. Here you can hear samples of all the songs on this great album, Rob's second swing album. Wonderful new songs, old songs and duets with Michael Bublé, Kelly Clarkson, Lily Allen, Rufus Wainwright and Olly Murs.

What are you loving?
I love.... Ron of course! :) But I also love nature, books, music, internet. I love my pets, my friends and family. I love snow and ice, the cold season. I love walking my pagan path. I love the beach and dunes, trees, stones. And I could probably come up with a lot more I love!

What are you wearing?
Same as always, because i'm comfortable in it: jeans and a sweater. A new black jeans this time, just bought it a week ago, a size smaller than last time, yay!

What are you creating?
I'm busy writing a new column for PaganPages. For the December/Yule issue (coming any day now, soon!) I've writen about creative witchy stuff. My latest creation was a rite-of-passage-cord for the daughter of a Craft-sister. You can see it here.

What are you looking forward to?
I'm so much looking forward to the end of the financial crisis. In general, but especially in our own personal situation... I can't wait for it to finally end. I know there's light at the end of this very long tunnel, but I wholeheartedly hope we get there real soon!

De-Selfie

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more KIOS

Kickin'It Old Skool, Day 1
Day One of Kickin It Old Skool (KIOS) and I'm already slacking... Oops! To be honest I completely forgot about it until today (Dec. 2). Sooo.... I'm cheating and posting this as if I posted it yesterday, LOL! 'Today' we share selfies!

~*~*~*~

I could make it easy and post this 'selfie':

It IS me, at least my online presence as Tink, made by the talented Emila Yusof. 

But I guess you want to see the real me? Okay, here is my current Facebook profile pic:

It's an old one, but dear to me because it shows me with 'my' tree. I love trees and this is a special one to me. 

Okay, okay... I'll make one right now with the webcam....

So... that's me!

Robbie Live 2013

Towards the end of 2012 Robbie Williams made an announcement: in 2013 he would finally make another tour. Of course Amsterdam was in the list of concerts. I was over the moon and very sad at the same time. Our financial situation didn't allow me to buy a ticket of almost € 100...

Disappointed as I was I poured out my heart on my Facebook wall. The comments were heartwarming! Me not going to Rob's concert was out of the question, I just had to find a way! The solution presented itself when a dear friend offered to go together; she would pay in advance and I could pay her back whenever possible. I hate debts, especially with friends, but it was an offer I couldn't refuse!

We decided to go for seated tickets, because unfortunately my chronic fatigue prevents me from standing in the field. During the 2006 tour I had the best spot possible: front row in the middle. Bittersweet memories because it was only a week after my mum passed away...

Then finally.... Saturday July 13th was RW-day! I drove all the way back from a festival I was attending and off we went to the Amsterdam Arena. We were in our seats 20 minutes before the support act started. This time it was Olly Murs, a nice guy but better on tv than on stage. Ah well, it was enjoyable when getting ready for the Real Thing!

The concert was great! Rob seemed so relaxed, happy and comfortable on stage but still funny and as cheeky as ever. He performed a wonderful mix of old and new songs, chatted in between and all that in a stunning setting I won't even try to describe... He is an entertainer pur sang and doesn't need it, but it made the show even better.

The setlist as I remember it (wrote it down afterwards):

• Hey Wow Yeah Yeah (instrumental) 
• Let Me Entertain You 
• Monsoon 
• Not Like The Others 
• Minnie The Moocher 
• Kids (with Olly Murs)
• Sin Sin Sin 
• Bodies 
• Come Undone 
• Everything Changes 
• Strong 
• Gospel 
• Be a Boy 
• Millennium / Better Man / Sexed Up 
• Me and My Monkey 
• Candy 
• Hot Fudge 
• Rudebox 
• Rock DJ

and of course in the encores my all-time favourite Feel, She's The One and the inevitable sing-along Angels.

The Kids duet with Olly Murs was funny, but not a success. Please sing it with one of the wonderful backing singers next time, Rob... During Me and My Monkey I sent Ron a text message; it's his favourite Robbie-song. My friend recorded Candy for her little daughter who loves the song. So many songs, so little time... Afterwards I picked up the 3cd-recording of the concert so I can go back and relive it whenever I want!

I lost my voice a bit and had a sore throat from yelling, but boy o boy was it worth it!! I had been looking forward to this for months and I wasn't disappointed, on the contrary: it was amazing! The magic never left Rob, he carries it with him inside and shares it freely during his concerts. The magic was tangible all around. A concert by Rob IS magic and that is high praise coming from a witch...

Just one minor mishap: he wore way too much clothing! LOL! He has trained for the tour and from pics we know he has a very fit body. Pity we didn't see much of it. But if that's all, well... I'll survive. ;-))

PaganPages

Do you know PaganPages? It's an online magazine or e-zine about all things pagan. I've been reading it for years now. Some time ago the editor invited me to become a regular columnist, to write about my pagan life. I was honoured and decided to give it a shot!

My first column is about who and what I am (in a pagan sense). You can read it here: Tink About it
But don't forget the rest, there are lots of interesting articles!