This afternoon I had two doctor's appointments in the CFS centre in Amsterdam. First I had to see the cardiologist. He asked me a lot of questions and did some tests. He made an ultrasound scan of my heart. My cholesterol was too high again (6, should be under 5) and my bloodpressure was also high (170-110). Together with my hereditary load and me being overweight there are a lot of risk factots. He wants to do more tests to look into it further.
The second appointment was with the internist. He also had a lot of questions. He doesn't trust the strange blackout episodes I have since I was about 14. The last months I didn't have one, but there isn't really a pattern. Sometimes I have three in a month and then none for months. I have had a lot of tests and specialists have looked at it several times, but no-one knew the answer except for what it is not. The last tests have been some years ago, so the internist wants me to visit a neurologist. It doesn't hurt to look at it again. I guess!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Monday, December 15, 2008
Midwinterfair 2008
Yesterday Ron and I visited themepark Archeon for the 6th Midwinterfair, a mix of fantasy, paganism, middle-ages, Celts, etc. with stands, demonstrations, live action role-playing, storytellers, bands and lots more. We were there around 11am. The weather was cold but dry.
First we walked around to see what's there. On our way we met a lot of people we know. In a yurt we listened with Wonder to Donderelf. When Theresia starts playing her harp I'm enchanted. When Philip is telling a story I'm under his spell. He told about Baba Yaga and the story of the Raven King.
In one of the buildings was a stand with Tisa Pescar and Mel Hartman. Tisa signed her book for me on Castlefest last August. I brought Mel's first book "De Fantasiejagers" (the fantasy hunters) with me and bought her second book "Droomloos" (dreamless). She signed both for me. If you read Dutch and like fantasy suspense, I can recommend them! This is the website.
At the end of the day we enjoyed a concert by Rapalje, celtic folk music. The hall was packed with people, all enthusiastic. They played a repertoire of requests from fans. I loved it. I was dog tired, but when Rapalje is playing I can't stand still!
If you want to see our pictures, you can find them here.
First we walked around to see what's there. On our way we met a lot of people we know. In a yurt we listened with Wonder to Donderelf. When Theresia starts playing her harp I'm enchanted. When Philip is telling a story I'm under his spell. He told about Baba Yaga and the story of the Raven King.
In one of the buildings was a stand with Tisa Pescar and Mel Hartman. Tisa signed her book for me on Castlefest last August. I brought Mel's first book "De Fantasiejagers" (the fantasy hunters) with me and bought her second book "Droomloos" (dreamless). She signed both for me. If you read Dutch and like fantasy suspense, I can recommend them! This is the website.
At the end of the day we enjoyed a concert by Rapalje, celtic folk music. The hall was packed with people, all enthusiastic. They played a repertoire of requests from fans. I loved it. I was dog tired, but when Rapalje is playing I can't stand still!
If you want to see our pictures, you can find them here.
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Ara Global ritual
We did several RAT's (ritual apart together) with the Ara Lowlands group. Phyllis proposed to do one with the global community. So yesterday evening (9pm my time) people in the Netherlands, Italy and the USA all sat down at their homes to do a ritual together on the astral plane!
I had made a little altar in my room, burned some incense and sat in my meditation chair in front of it. When the drumming started, I was almost immediately in my little hut at the base of the hill. We were putting on our robes; not the usual green ones, but black and purple ones with a hood.
We started walking up the hill in the east. In the west was a sacred well against the side of the hill. The lid covered the well a bit and was decorated with the Ara-logo. The full moon reflected in the water. From the well some water was running into a little pond. A beautiful black horse was drinking from it. I drew some water from the well with a silver bowl. I saw the reflection of the moon in the bowl.
On the top of the hill we gathered around the altar stone on the meadow in front of our temple. I put the bowl with water on the altar. There also were a silver bowl with black salt, an Abalone shell with incense and a cauldron with (controlled) fire. We cast the circle from hand to hand, evoked the powers of the elements and invited the God and Goddess. The Oak Grove grounding exercise was very powerful. All our roots intermingled as one.
The Cone of Power for the Temple of Ara was a very special experience. When we were slowly walking around, the black horse was walking with us in a circle outside ours. When we picked up speed, so did she. At the zenith of power someone yelled “now!” and the horse pranced, while we released the power into the bowl with water. It was a splendid blue-silvery light, that in the bowl started to sparkle and twinkle. I raised the bowl to charge it extra with moonlight. Then all of us took a sip. The atmosphere was warm, friendly and cheerful.
After the cake & wine we thanked the powers of the elements and the God and Goddess. We closed the circle from hand to hand and sang “May the circle be open”. I made offerings on the meadow.
Slowly we walked down the hill. In the west the sea was wild. In the distance was an old four-master bravely defying the waves. At the foot of the hill we made a big campfire and sat around it. We chatted, ate and drank. Some people had drums. Later someone had a guitar and we started singing chants and old songs everyone knows. Until very late we stayed around the fire. When we finally went our own ways, the parting took a while with hugs and kisses. It really felt as if a deep and loving bond was forged.
I had made a little altar in my room, burned some incense and sat in my meditation chair in front of it. When the drumming started, I was almost immediately in my little hut at the base of the hill. We were putting on our robes; not the usual green ones, but black and purple ones with a hood.
We started walking up the hill in the east. In the west was a sacred well against the side of the hill. The lid covered the well a bit and was decorated with the Ara-logo. The full moon reflected in the water. From the well some water was running into a little pond. A beautiful black horse was drinking from it. I drew some water from the well with a silver bowl. I saw the reflection of the moon in the bowl.
On the top of the hill we gathered around the altar stone on the meadow in front of our temple. I put the bowl with water on the altar. There also were a silver bowl with black salt, an Abalone shell with incense and a cauldron with (controlled) fire. We cast the circle from hand to hand, evoked the powers of the elements and invited the God and Goddess. The Oak Grove grounding exercise was very powerful. All our roots intermingled as one.
The Cone of Power for the Temple of Ara was a very special experience. When we were slowly walking around, the black horse was walking with us in a circle outside ours. When we picked up speed, so did she. At the zenith of power someone yelled “now!” and the horse pranced, while we released the power into the bowl with water. It was a splendid blue-silvery light, that in the bowl started to sparkle and twinkle. I raised the bowl to charge it extra with moonlight. Then all of us took a sip. The atmosphere was warm, friendly and cheerful.
After the cake & wine we thanked the powers of the elements and the God and Goddess. We closed the circle from hand to hand and sang “May the circle be open”. I made offerings on the meadow.
Slowly we walked down the hill. In the west the sea was wild. In the distance was an old four-master bravely defying the waves. At the foot of the hill we made a big campfire and sat around it. We chatted, ate and drank. Some people had drums. Later someone had a guitar and we started singing chants and old songs everyone knows. Until very late we stayed around the fire. When we finally went our own ways, the parting took a while with hugs and kisses. It really felt as if a deep and loving bond was forged.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Ara Lowlands in Breda
Yesterday the Ara Lowlands group met in Breda. I picked up the girls from Amsterdam and drove to Breda. We chatted over a cup of tea. It had been a while since we came together, so there was some catching up to do!
The weather was cold but good, so we went for a long walk in the Mastbos. This time not to visit my beloved tree; we decided to walk a marked route. It was beautiful and relaxing.
On a clearing a lot of fir trees were cut. It hurts to see so many trees on the ground, but there was a sign explaining why it was done: to give the smaller trees and plants more light to grow, to get rid of foreign trees that don't belong there and to give the animals some open spaces they need. The cut off wood will be removed and new life can develop spontaneously. We took some of the fir branches to give them a place in our homes.
When we were walking somewhere on a path I saw something among the trees. It looked like a face. In fact it was a trunk overgrown with moss, but somehow it represented the Green Man.
Before we left we cast a circle near a pool and passed energy around.
When we came back, we warmed ourselves with ginger tea and made some plans for the new year. We have set some dates until the initiation. I also told the girls I'm not sure whether I can go to the initiation. I have the money set aside, but I'm not sure it can stay that way because of our current situation. Of course I'll do anything I can to be there, but I thought it was only fair to tell them. They were very sympathetic and kind, it was heartwarming.
After dinner we made a little altar on the table. My new statue ( a little copy in bronze of The Kiss by Rodin) was the centerpiece representing the god and goddess. We cast the circle with sparklers, from light to light; it looked splendid! We did divination, first for the Temple of Ara and then for ourselves. I had brought my Druid Plant Oracle, because I haven't used it a lot yet. For myself I took one card, meadowsweet. To make it short that stands for cherishing and celebrating the stable factors in your life. I have to focus on what Ron and I have together. Circumstances and jobs may change, but we always have each other.
The weather was cold but good, so we went for a long walk in the Mastbos. This time not to visit my beloved tree; we decided to walk a marked route. It was beautiful and relaxing.
On a clearing a lot of fir trees were cut. It hurts to see so many trees on the ground, but there was a sign explaining why it was done: to give the smaller trees and plants more light to grow, to get rid of foreign trees that don't belong there and to give the animals some open spaces they need. The cut off wood will be removed and new life can develop spontaneously. We took some of the fir branches to give them a place in our homes.
When we were walking somewhere on a path I saw something among the trees. It looked like a face. In fact it was a trunk overgrown with moss, but somehow it represented the Green Man.
Before we left we cast a circle near a pool and passed energy around.
When we came back, we warmed ourselves with ginger tea and made some plans for the new year. We have set some dates until the initiation. I also told the girls I'm not sure whether I can go to the initiation. I have the money set aside, but I'm not sure it can stay that way because of our current situation. Of course I'll do anything I can to be there, but I thought it was only fair to tell them. They were very sympathetic and kind, it was heartwarming.
After dinner we made a little altar on the table. My new statue ( a little copy in bronze of The Kiss by Rodin) was the centerpiece representing the god and goddess. We cast the circle with sparklers, from light to light; it looked splendid! We did divination, first for the Temple of Ara and then for ourselves. I had brought my Druid Plant Oracle, because I haven't used it a lot yet. For myself I took one card, meadowsweet. To make it short that stands for cherishing and celebrating the stable factors in your life. I have to focus on what Ron and I have together. Circumstances and jobs may change, but we always have each other.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
TT #92: update
Thirteen things about my life at the moment
~*~*~*~ |
Thursday, December 04, 2008
Cats & Dogs Elf Dance!
I saw this at Gandalf & Grayson and decided to let our pets star in their own elf dance video! So without further ado I present to you: Boris, Foofur, Freyja, Bastet & Maia!!!!!!
Send your own ElfYourself eCards
Tuesday, December 02, 2008
Pen and paper
This was my daily horoscope for today:
I took the challenge and did some real writing today. Not a form or a list of errands but a letter, a story or a diary; you get the point. So I ask you: when did you do "real" writing? How often and for what do you use pen & paper?
"When's the last time you used a pen and paper? In this day and age of computers, the keyboard has all but replaced these wonderful tools. In the same way that walking provides much more than fresh air, the kinesthetic value of the rhythmic motion in writing with a pen is far more soothing and even healing than most realize. Moving your hand across the page can feel good and unlock places within you that aren't always accessed by typing. Try it today. "Although I'm a computer addict, I still love to write pen on paper. The above is so right! For me typing on my computer will never replace pen & paper completely, as e-books will definitely not replace real books.
I took the challenge and did some real writing today. Not a form or a list of errands but a letter, a story or a diary; you get the point. So I ask you: when did you do "real" writing? How often and for what do you use pen & paper?
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
COT #21: Maia locked in
CATS ON TUESDAY is a group of cat lovers
who share pictures and/or stories about their cats once a week,
hosted by Gattina.
Maia loves to sit close to me when I'm at my computerdesk. Any place on or in the desk will do: in front of the monitor, on the mousepad, on the papers around me, on the keyboard, etc. Sometimes she just sits quietly behind the monitor.
Last week she was sitting there again, when Ron and I had to go out for a while. Maia jumped from her place to the table behind me. I closed the desk, as always keeping a crack open so the computer can release warmth. Ron and I went away and came back later that afternoon. When I opened my desk Maia ran out of it in a flash. The poor thing must somehow have jumped back in the desk and behind the monitor before I shut it. She must have panicked; the inside of my desk was a huge mess. There had been a big glass of cola, but that was empty... My keyboard had drowned in the cola, my 2009 daily planner and the other paper stuff were torn and soaked too. Fortunately my computer and printer are in separate departments in my desk, so they were okay. Ron got me another keyboard and I've ordered a new planner. To my surprise Maia still loves the desk, but I check it multiple times whenever I close it!Saturday, November 22, 2008
Welcome to my world
Sometimes you hear a song and suddenly you are back in time. While doing all kinds of things on the computer I had my mediaplayer set on random when I heard Jim Reeves singing "Welcome to my world".Within seconds I was sitting in my childhood living room, talking and making cryptograms with my dad. He was a big fan of Jim Reeves and he transferred it to me. Just like he did with the Rat Pack, although dad liked Sinatra best and I was more fond of Dean Martin. He liked more modern music too though. He watched "Toppop" and "Countdown" (Dutch shows, comparable with Top of the Pops) with me. We commented the songs together, but didn't always agree. :-)
I know I've inherited a lot from my dad, like the music preferences, love for puzzling esp. cryptograms, being good with figures & numbers and more virtues & vices. We had a great bond and I still miss him so much. If only I could talk with him again, hug him and tell him how much I love him. I guess he knows, I know he knows.
I have a 16CD box of Jim Reeves in my files. I just want to listen and reminisce for a while longer...
Won't you come on in
Miracles I guess
Still happen now and then
Step into my heart
Leave your cares behind
Welcome to my world
Built with you in mind
Knock and the door will open
Seek and you will find
Ask and you'll be given
The key to this world of mine
I'll be waiting here
With my arms unfurled
Waiting just for you
Welcome to my world
Waiting just for you
Welcome to my world
Monday, November 17, 2008
Dusty Miller the 14th
A few months ago I heard that Dusty Miller the 13th would come to The Netherlands again, this time with his son Dusty the 14th. He would be doing the talks and his son the walks. I've been to walk & talk meetings with Dusty 13 in 2006 and 2007. I was looking forward to seeing him again, introducing his son to the public. I decided to go to the Walk & Talk at Antropia in Driebergen.
Unfortunately Dusty the 13th couldn't come yesterday, because he is suffering from balance problems after a fall recently. Dusty the 14th and his wife Claudia took charge of the whole day. I must say I did miss the old Dusty, but his son makes a very good successor! Claudia adds her own touch and they work great together.
In the morning a group of people (and a lovely dog) started with a Walk. We did some exercises, feeling leylines and the boundaries of the tree spirits. We learned about lunar and solar trees, and tried to feel the difference. We raised and sent energy around a big tree and sent it to Dusty the 14th. It felt very strong and powerful. We ended the walk with a beautiful tree meditation, in which we met the dryad of the beech we were surrounding. After the meditation we sang a Native American song of thanks to the trees. Just before lunch Dusty had a talk on the phone with his father. The old Dusty asked what we had been doing, because he sparkled from energy and felt very good!
After a yummy elaborate lunch we gathered in a hall for the "Talk". Dusty told about his fascinating family history, about the livewood and lots more! He also answered questions from the public. I had heard some things before (from his father), but that didn't matter. He knows how to captivate an audience very well. He is so much like his father and still is very different!
Around 5.30pm I drove home, tired but very satisfied. I had a fabulous day!
Unfortunately Dusty the 13th couldn't come yesterday, because he is suffering from balance problems after a fall recently. Dusty the 14th and his wife Claudia took charge of the whole day. I must say I did miss the old Dusty, but his son makes a very good successor! Claudia adds her own touch and they work great together.
In the morning a group of people (and a lovely dog) started with a Walk. We did some exercises, feeling leylines and the boundaries of the tree spirits. We learned about lunar and solar trees, and tried to feel the difference. We raised and sent energy around a big tree and sent it to Dusty the 14th. It felt very strong and powerful. We ended the walk with a beautiful tree meditation, in which we met the dryad of the beech we were surrounding. After the meditation we sang a Native American song of thanks to the trees. Just before lunch Dusty had a talk on the phone with his father. The old Dusty asked what we had been doing, because he sparkled from energy and felt very good!
After a yummy elaborate lunch we gathered in a hall for the "Talk". Dusty told about his fascinating family history, about the livewood and lots more! He also answered questions from the public. I had heard some things before (from his father), but that didn't matter. He knows how to captivate an audience very well. He is so much like his father and still is very different!
Around 5.30pm I drove home, tired but very satisfied. I had a fabulous day!
- All my pictures
- Dutch livewood website (most of it in English)
- German Livewood website
- Geronimo (Jeroen Heindijk, who organises the Dusty events in The Netherlands)
- The Dusty Millers Homepage
- MySpace Dusty 13th
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
My room and a ritual
Last Saturday three friends came to our home to do a ritual. Ron and I had cleaned the house and decorated my room to make it a bit cosier. I hung a celtic tree cloth on the bare wooden wall and put other cloths over cardboard boxes and such. The altar chest stood in the middle and I decorated the side cabinet. I put my lamp on some boxes. Last week I got this wonderful Lunar Calendar 2009 by fantasy artist Gwen Davies. I love it, so framed it and put it in a chair (afterwards I hung it on the wall).
Some time ago I decided I wanted to do a Cone of Power for a very good friend. I asked the friends we celebrated Litha with to join me. They all wanted but not everyone was able to come, so we were with the four of us. I had written the ritual, because the others aren't that experienced yet and I know our friend best. We divided the roles among us. I guided the circle from hand to hand, explained about the Cone and led the others into a guided meditation. I hadn't written anything down for the meditation; I knew what I wanted to accomplish with it, so I improvised while doing it. I think it went well, I got good reactions. The Cone of Power was very strong, we all felt it as almost touchable.
Afterwards we had diner together. Everyone had contributed something. We had chicken soup, french bread with garlic butter, Russian salad, salmon salad and a fresh salad. We were hungry and thirsty after the ritual! After diner they stayed for a while and we chatted about the ritual and other stuff. In the evening everyone went home.
Some time ago I decided I wanted to do a Cone of Power for a very good friend. I asked the friends we celebrated Litha with to join me. They all wanted but not everyone was able to come, so we were with the four of us. I had written the ritual, because the others aren't that experienced yet and I know our friend best. We divided the roles among us. I guided the circle from hand to hand, explained about the Cone and led the others into a guided meditation. I hadn't written anything down for the meditation; I knew what I wanted to accomplish with it, so I improvised while doing it. I think it went well, I got good reactions. The Cone of Power was very strong, we all felt it as almost touchable.
Afterwards we had diner together. Everyone had contributed something. We had chicken soup, french bread with garlic butter, Russian salad, salmon salad and a fresh salad. We were hungry and thirsty after the ritual! After diner they stayed for a while and we chatted about the ritual and other stuff. In the evening everyone went home.
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Chronic fatigue
This morning I had an appointment at the CFS Centre in Amsterdam, a specialized centre for chronigue fatigue. In advance I had my blood tested and filled in a pile of questionnaires. Today I went to see dr. Vermeulen, the director / coordinator of the CFS Centre. He asked a lot of questions and explained several things. He was very friendly and made me feel at ease.
My case is complex, but that applies to all their patients. Before I do the physical test the team will discuss my problems and do a thorough analysis. I have appointments with the cardiologist and the internist in December. We'll see where we go from there.
Finally... I'm taken seriously! I feel so good about that.
My case is complex, but that applies to all their patients. Before I do the physical test the team will discuss my problems and do a thorough analysis. I have appointments with the cardiologist and the internist in December. We'll see where we go from there.
Finally... I'm taken seriously! I feel so good about that.
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Wednesday, November 05, 2008
Congratulations, America!
This is no political blog, but for an historic moment like this I'm making an exception. Barack Obama will be the next president of the United States of America. I didn't stay up all night to follow everything, but early in the morning I watched his fabulous acceptance speech. I congratulate him with his victory and I congratulate America with what in my humble opinion is a good decision. Change is coming and it won't be easy; not on Obama, not on America, not on the world. He'll have to live up to the huge expectations and the promises he made. With that and his difficult task ahead I wish him success and wisdom. Yes, you can!
Monday, November 03, 2008
Long ago I started a Facebook profile, but somehow it disappeared. I never made a new one... until last Saturday! I heard (read) people talking (writing) about it and couldn't resist. And now I'm there every day. I found some pagan friends, Robbie fan-friends, joined some groups and so on... and on! It's so much fun, so much more to explore.
Are you on Facebook? Visit me here!
Are you on Facebook? Visit me here!
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